The Beauty of Preparation

Preparation is a wonderful motivator when you’re aiming for an aspiration beyond your current means.

The best example I have to offer is travel; I have so many people contacting me about finding the courage to give up their day job to travel. When I question them about their travel aspirations, it’s evident that they’ve only ever thought about the fantasy and not given much thought on actual details.

It’s very easy to say what it is you want to do in life because there’s no commitment; there’s no investment made towards your aspirations, be it time and/or money. I cannot stress enough that simply thinking, saying out loud or sharing your aspirations with others is only the foundation for getting what you want.

It will forever remain an aspiration; a fantasy that will never be pulled into the realm of reality, if a thought is your only investment. Your thoughts are just sparks, there’s a lot more involved if you actually want to ignite a flame.

The one thing that separates those who do and those who don’t, is often investment and preparation and it’s completely typical to start small. For instance before I went traveling, I invested time and effort on defining details. The what, where, how, and why….I figured those out first and the when became much clearer. I even began taking short trips away within my means, just to get familiar with being on my own and exploring new places independently. The more prep work I did and the more I educated myself, helped me fulfill that aspiration and I went from talking about it to actually living it.

I almost approach my aspirations as if I’m heading into a debate, I aim to be well prepared to confidently tackle any argument presented to me. They say knowledge gives you power, because knowledge reduces fear and the less you fear, the more you control.

My new coaching business for instance, two years ago when I had the idea in my mind, I wasn’t prepared. I hadn’t figured out the details let alone the credentials. Two years on, as I continued to prepare for that aspiration, I’m ready to enter the “debate.” I have everything I need to start this new path, towards the aspiration I sparked some time ago. Preparation kept the aspiration alive and real, until the when fell into place.

Whatever your aspirations are, don’t allow yourself to become overwhelmed by what seems impossible. Break down your aspirations into finite details, apply your identity to them and really grasp what it is you truly desire.

Whether it means opening a savings account or simply absorbing more knowledge to really define what it is you want, in doing so you begin your adventure. So prepare yourself today and get ready for the aspiration you’re going to fulfill tomorrow.

Vancouver Relationship and Life Coach

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Are Your Motivations Man-made?

Thinker

Have you ever wondered how much of your life is man-made? Ever considered how much of your life is driven by man-made philosophies that guide your choices, mould your identity and overrun your emotions and natural desires?

Take the institution of marriage for example, it’s not necessarily an innate desire, we’re taught to long for this lawful union. Religion too, people submit lives, generations even, towards words written by man. Our careers maybe, are they driven by our thirst for power and purpose or do we slave away for the sake of climbing a social ladder?

I was on a date a few weeks ago and the girl I met was nice enough, she was pretty, very intelligent and I would say she was text-book perfect. Problem was, I found her very reserved, afraid to open up and let out what she truly wanted from life. It seemed she was conditioned to believe marriage was one of life’s natural wonders, so when I posed the question, “What if the entire concept of marriage didn’t exist, what would be your drive for companionship?” She stared at me with the blankest expression as if her mind had been formatted, I felt like I had insulted her.

It got me thinking about how many people in my life have very similar views, I don’t think a week goes by where a family member or a friend asks me about my marital status or how many digits occupy my bank account. Is it not enough to just accept that I’m happy, healthy and human, surrounded by a truck load of love and that I now live with a mountain sized passion for life? It’s like many cannot accept that I could arrive at this level of fulfillment without having followed certain ideologies.

Is it that difficult to comprehend, that we can drive ourselves simply by the honesty we carry in our emotions? That life is actually a lot simpler outside the flow of man-made principles.

I’m beginning to wonder if humanity has lost touch with the very things that make us human. How is anyone supposed to reach self-actualization and fulfilment, if we’re so conditioned to live life dictated by man-made values, popular movements and lean our desires towards marketable trends?

OK, maybe I’m heading off on a frustrated tangent here, but think about it, when was the last time you did something unstructured and genuinely honest? How much of your life is innately motivated?

Give yourself the opportunity to ponder this thought and tap into your true intent, before making your next life decision.

Vancouver Relationship and Life Coach

Live Your Dream: If You Have Time To Think, You Have Time To Act.

Clapper

If I had the power, I would remove the need to require sleep, because just before bed my mind is always racing from all the ideas that I want to plan and put into action. I want to start researching and gathering information to make all my ideas a reality. If it weren’t for knowing that I have to sleep, I’d probably be up every single night taking action, making plans and igniting powerful energy towards a promising outcome. Nevertheless, I keep a pen and paper handy or my trusty Smartphone to jot down every idea that comes to mind, just so that my thoughts won’t run into a web of randomness and unorganized nonsense and so that I can get some much-needed shut-eye and look into my notes as soon as possible.

I overheard a conversation the other day, it was a couple of guys talking about a small business idea they had. It was just a simple idea that if researched enough, it could have proved successful for them. Here’s the thing, although spending all this time during their coffee break discussing an idea, they never spent one moment to act upon it. In that very short space of time they could have researched so much about their idea and they could have answered many of the questions they had. They could have looked into the feasibility of making their dream a reality; all it would have taken was a couple of Google searches to get the ball rolling. Unfortunately, like many others out there, they decided to pay for their coffee and return to work and ended off their conversation “if only we had the money” and walked away feeling intimidated by the very thought of making things happen.

I’m calling bullshit on this excuse. If they had 30 minutes to talk about an idea, dreaming up the potential lifestyles they could be living, they could have spent a good chunk of that 30 minutes looking into viable options towards making their dream a reality. Always remember, small actions that you take today can impact heavily on your future. If I had never opened up my laptop and wrote my first blog post, I wouldn’t be working on my book today. My excuse was always “I don’t have the time and I don’t know how to write.” Look at me now, I’m definitely a better writer now than I was then and now I can officially say to people “I’m a blogger!” I always anticipated that I’d be in this position today but never really expected it to happen and it all started out by taking small actions.

Many people forget that the most successful people they admire started off by taking small actions towards their dreams. Evidence can be found in the story behind any person you consider successful. Sir Allen Sugar started out selling products from the back of a van, Mark Zuckerberg started coding in his spare time, heck, even Beyoncé started out by singing in her back garden – look at where they are now and when the day comes to tell my story: I’ll say I started writing to kill time on a graveyard shift.

The examples are endless but the key to living any dream is to take action. Small steps towards success can lead to giant leaps towards your dreams. If you have the time to think about it you have the time to act on it! Remember, a vital component towards achieving anything in life is taking the steps to make things happen.

Vancouver Relationship and Life Coach

Be Successful: Nurture Your Goals

Having traveled back to the UK for the first time after a couple of years, I never felt more motivated to really nurture the goals I had set myself. I sat at my old desk, the very same desk I sat at to research and plan my way out of frustration and the mind-numbing life I had been living. I had a flashback to when I booked my first ticket out of the UK and it woke me up to realize how far I had really come. I also came to understand the potential of how much further I can go if I continued to nurture my goals. Even when there was that small crumb of doubt that things wouldn’t quite work out the way I wanted, my focused attention helped brush it off.

I met with old friends and past colleagues and many of them had set goals for themselves but had failed to reach them. They had set goals, but that was the easy part. Goals are the final result you want, you need to nurture a goal to make things happen. When I set a goal I look at hundreds of options before discovering how to do it, working on a goal regularly allows me to achieve it.

Research: probably the most important part of any goal set. Researching every aspect of your goal will start you off in the right direction. Research gives you options; it gives you ideas and will eventually open the door to a new opportunity. It may close the door on some ideas you thought would have worked, but upon further investigation you may realize that it isn’t what you want. Research allows you fine tune your goals and allows your objectives to fall into place.

Act Now or Never: the time to start is now, that doesn’t mean your end goal will be achieved right now, It means taking the first step: booking the ticket, starting the course, viewing the house…whatever the goal is you have many actions you can take right now that relate directly to it. If you don’t act now you delay the life you want to live. People often need reminding that it takes a lot of hard work, dedication and determination to get there and it won’t be easy! But the more you throw yourself into the world if your goal the easier it’ll get.

Adopt the right attitude: the biggest threat to you is yourself. Only you determine your failures and successes, I know this from firsthand experience. A lot of failures come from a weak state of mind, allowing yourself to follow the shadow of someone else’s success, allowing the first hurdle overwhelm your ambition and the fear of loss are common traits that can infiltrate an opportunists mind. One thing I can tell you is, no matter what level of success you achieve, hurdles are always going to be in your path, challenges will become more often than you think, but the thing that will distinguish those who succeed and will continue to do so, over those who won’t, are how challenges are met. Welcome them.

Repeat: as you progress to success remember to always go back to research and consider following through this advice over and over again. Each time set your sights higher and continue to build on your success, don’t get complacent. You can’t just stop at one achievement! I see my successes as stepping-stones, one just leads to the other. Your knowledge and understanding will develop, you’ll notice that you will want more and crave more. You’ll figure out a formula that works for you and before you know your life can surpass your dreams as you set more ambitious goals.

Wanting success is like a drug, I understand why many people say that once you’ve had a small taste you’ll want more and more. Its hunger, my drive and passion is practically linked to a physiological response because it’s just as important to me as eating. We only have this life right now and if we don’t live it we won’t have lived.

Vancouver Relationship and Life Coach

A Simple Way to Stimulate Creativity and Inspiration

We sometimes struggle when developing new ideas and in that struggle we feel faulted by our own creativity. Pressure and stress begin to fill our minds because we feel we cannot successfully deploy or complete a project and soon enough, a looming deadline is all we seem to focus on. Whatever creative thought we had, is being blocked by a wall of doubt and uncertainty.

The first mistake we often make is forcing creativity, we feel so pressured by getting something done that the end result turns out to be poor and of a lower standard to what we’re actually capable of. In the end, we’re left with the satisfaction of a completed project rather than the fulfillment of an accomplished one.

An ‘original break’ is something I started doing when I lacked focus, when I feel I have lost my muse and procrastination becomes a meaningful pastime. Generally if whatever project I’m working on isn’t flowing naturally and my train of thought is only just chugging along, then that’s my indicator to do something to get back on track.

An original break is about fueling the mind and trailing into fresh thought. An original break is not going out to grab a coffee and some fresh air. It’s first stepping away from what you’re working on and closing the entire project down and leaving it alone for some time. Just like your mind needs a break from the project, the project needs a break from your tired mind and poor input. Like the engine performance of a car running on standard gas versus premium fuel.

Your original break could be heading out to lunch in a different restaurant to break routine, like how you were when you first tried sushi.  It’s talking to a complete stranger to adopt a different point of view or even talking to people who disagree with your ideas. It’s going for a drive to that part of town you’ve always heard about but never visited; exploring new environments is always a good way to stimulate creativity. It’s reading a type of book that you wouldn’t normally read. It’s simply taking the time to discover something new, placing new thoughts and ideas into your mind to stimulate creativity when returning to an existing project.

It seems a little strange at first, but this simple formula helps break down walls that block creative thought. These small adjustments in your breaks could result in a wonder of opportunities for your work. You may not necessarily be inspired by anything you experience but you will leave with new thought(s).

Naturally we’re curious creatures and unlike robots we have a natural desire to learn and explore its how we’ve managed to advance as a species. Remember creativity and inspiration aren’t timed to surge between the hours of 9 and 5 but if your need it then you have to find ways to stimulate it.

Vancouver Relationship and Life Coach