The Personal Development Cycle

the-personal-development-cycle

Learn all about The Personal Development Cycle, on my new blog here: vancitylifecoach.com/blog

“If 2016 has taught us anything, it’s that we can no longer sit and wait for positive change to come knocking on our doors, we actually have to invest the effort and energy to drive our lives forward, in the direction we want them to go. Fortunately, we can kick start positive change by investing time in personal development, and it doesn’t have to be a daunting task either, for personal development works as a cycle that functions in both directions, and we can start wherever we feel most comfortable”

Live Your Dream: Invest Your Time Wisely

Make a Splash!

Remember when we were kids and we used to aimlessly jump into puddles, I remember I used to go out my way to find these shallow patches of water to make the biggest splash that I could. I’d get so carried away until I had completely drenched my socks misjudging the depth, but I didn’t care. I remember it being so thrilling because I was doing what I wanted to do, regardless of being told otherwise and each time it felt like some sort of accomplishment. Recently this random thought had stuck with me for a while and I noticed how differently many of us live our lives today. How many of us can honestly say we seek that thrill and want to make that impact? Don’t get me wrong I understand that we have responsibilities now and commitments that we never had before, but surely there’s still enough time to jump into a puddle now and then; investing time into shaping the life we want to lead will positively impact on our lives.

Do we invest enough time towards building the life we want to live and the way we want to live it? We continue to follow the same routine daily only to realize how much time we could have spent investing into our true goals. Things had recently settled down for me and I began to feel incredibly uncomfortable; surely working everyday and paying bills on time every month isn’t what people have evolved to. I know there is so much more I want from life because there’s so much more that life has to offer. I’m at a point now where I’ve met a lot of goals and now I’m ready to aim higher. I’m ready to jump into even bigger puddles.

I find it absolutely frustrating when I come across people who are willing to invest more time deciding on what type of partner they want before carving out an identity of their own. I find it disheartening when I see parents spend more time in a furniture store deciding on which coffee table to purchase rather than nurturing the minds of their offspring. I also find it bizarre how people can tell me more about other individuals, but can hardly piece two sentences together about themselves. At what point did this change, we start lives off so care-free and so individual to only have our identities consumed by the routines we follow. Somehow we decide to be a little more careful and take fewer risks; we find more time for the most insignificant decisions over investing time in shaping our own lives because we’re either afraid of failure or just learn that we simply can’t.

I turn to the people I admire today and am in awe of what they have achieved because it all started with a risk. Looking into a bold move and diving into a new challenge, they never allow themselves to become complacent and always aim higher. Never feeling they’ve hit their peak and investing their time wisely by seeking opportunity and focusing on goals by drowning out the pollution around them. My sister is probably one of the strongest willed people I know; a description of hell would probably sound like a vacation compared to the ups and downs she has faced in life, but nothing has stopped her from aiming higher to prove to herself, not to anybody else, that she can create a life that she is truly satisfied with.

Had a random conversation about the universe today and the topic lead to how minute our lives are in comparison to time and space, I thought to myself, f*** that! That notion doesn’t work for me, I may be only one out of about 7 billion people on this planet but I’m going to make pretty damn sure that this “one” makes an impact on himself and actually lives. There’s already too many irritated souls filling this planet with doubt and negativity not realizing that the benefits of today came from the ones who made a big splash yesterday.  I’m not saying I want my name to go down in the history books and I don’t adopt this mind-set purely for others to know who I am and what I’m about. I simply know what I can achieve for myself. Prove to myself that this life is worth more than a routine. Life shouldn’t be wasted walking around puddles taking the safer route, just jump right in and make that splash!

Vancouver Relationship and Life Coach

Become More Confident: The Confidence and Curiosity Cycle

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Curiosity boosting confidence – the most enriched people I’ve come across show signs of being able to boost confidence by delving into curiosity. Confidence grows as you continue to understand who you are and what you want, therefore when curiosity is explored you learn that much more about yourself, what you like and don’t like, if you are good at something or not – curiosity opens areas of your own person you never thought or believed existed. The scary part is you need to have the guts to plunge into it first, which is how confidence allows you to be more curious.

Achieve a result: When you finally dive into exploring curiosity, the biggest challenge is seeing it through; people fall at the first hurdle and it tends to negatively impact their confidence. So even though you may have just begun to explore, you need to push yourself until you achieve some sort of result in order for you to gain confidence. Otherwise, you may end up letting yourself down, leading to self doubt – which is how curiosity can negatively impact confidence.

 Confidence allowing us to be curious – Think about when you embarked on something new for the first time: like a job/new business, an extreme sport, even travelling on your own for the first time. Certain triggers led you there, the fears and anxieties often spark your curiosity, maybe it sparked an interest, maybe you saw someone else’s courage or maybe, you know what it will do to your own self-esteem if you ventured into curious territory. These triggers open up your mind, you want to learn and know more so you build confidence by gaining a level of understanding first – often leading to research and assessment. Others, on the other hand, can jump right in based on what they may already know or have experienced. Either way, you go through these steps in order to ease the pressure of the pursuit. As they say – knowledge is power and with this confidence you’re more likely to take a chance.

Take action: When you build your confidence to a level of allowing yourself to be curious – be curious and discover. I’ve noticed I can only build confidence when I pair it with action. You’ll notice that when you bump into people who only appear to be confident, it’s because they cannot pair action/evidence to what they appear to know.

The drawback and gain: When the cycle is fully deployed and you didn’t gain the results you had expected, you can still leave with the peace of mind of knowing you had explored unknown/unfamiliar territory. Relishing in the fact you gained some sort of knowledge and understanding something you may never have understood before – be it about yourself or anything else. Although you may struggle to repeat the cycle again so soon, you will do so with more caution and preparation. Going through the whole cycle with a positive outcome, you will only become more curious and more confident or vice versa, and as you repeat the process over and over you will gain knowledge and understanding of whom you are which can only work wonders for your own self-esteem.

Vancouver Relationship and Life Coach

 

Flip the Cliché and Live Each Day Like It’s Your First.

The first day I started to write felt like a brand new day. That day I wasn’t thinking like it was my last living day which is advice people often dish out. I was in a very naive state of mind and terrified of the outcome yet the curiosity was overwhelming, exciting and fresh. The only way I could sum it up was like how a baby discovers new things; I broke away from convention and delved into the unknown. The knowledge I gained from new experiences, woke me up to live life with an open mind, which turned out to be a huge bonus towards my career. Having an open mind paved the way for new opportunity.

I’ve never understood why people would want to live each day like it’s there last anyway, it’s depressing. Doing things you’ve always wanted to do because you may not be around tomorrow? If that’s the case then I’d rather spend my days having a great time with my nearest and dearest and do things I know and love, right? In my opinion it’s an old-fashioned term that is slightly flawed. I now also find that when I’m in a state of procrastination, it’s not because I lack the motivation, it’s because my mind is craving stimulation and new thought. Sort of like jump starting a car, I need a boost of new energy and this formula worked.

The point I’m trying to make is to open your mind up and relish in being inquisitive. It’s freeing. I aim to try something imaginative every day however cliché that may sound. I realized broadening experience opens doors and opportunities, if not; it makes for new conversation pieces over the drinking table. Nevertheless, we live in an era whereby a global community is within reach, sharing is a pastime and innovation is ordinary so we need to seek out new ideas through new experiences.

VanCity