The Beauty of Preparation

Preparation is a wonderful motivator when you’re aiming for an aspiration beyond your current means.

The best example I have to offer is travel; I have so many people contacting me about finding the courage to give up their day job to travel. When I question them about their travel aspirations, it’s evident that they’ve only ever thought about the fantasy and not given much thought on actual details.

It’s very easy to say what it is you want to do in life because there’s no commitment; there’s no investment made towards your aspirations, be it time and/or money. I cannot stress enough that simply thinking, saying out loud or sharing your aspirations with others is only the foundation for getting what you want.

It will forever remain an aspiration; a fantasy that will never be pulled into the realm of reality, if a thought is your only investment. Your thoughts are just sparks, there’s a lot more involved if you actually want to ignite a flame.

The one thing that separates those who do and those who don’t, is often investment and preparation and it’s completely typical to start small. For instance before I went traveling, I invested time and effort on defining details. The what, where, how, and why….I figured those out first and the when became much clearer. I even began taking short trips away within my means, just to get familiar with being on my own and exploring new places independently. The more prep work I did and the more I educated myself, helped me fulfill that aspiration and I went from talking about it to actually living it.

I almost approach my aspirations as if I’m heading into a debate, I aim to be well prepared to confidently tackle any argument presented to me. They say knowledge gives you power, because knowledge reduces fear and the less you fear, the more you control.

My new coaching business for instance, two years ago when I had the idea in my mind, I wasn’t prepared. I hadn’t figured out the details let alone the credentials. Two years on, as I continued to prepare for that aspiration, I’m ready to enter the “debate.” I have everything I need to start this new path, towards the aspiration I sparked some time ago. Preparation kept the aspiration alive and real, until the when fell into place.

Whatever your aspirations are, don’t allow yourself to become overwhelmed by what seems impossible. Break down your aspirations into finite details, apply your identity to them and really grasp what it is you truly desire.

Whether it means opening a savings account or simply absorbing more knowledge to really define what it is you want, in doing so you begin your adventure. So prepare yourself today and get ready for the aspiration you’re going to fulfill tomorrow.

Vancouver Relationship and Life Coach

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How to Develop Superpowers

Superpower

Your identity is the force that will guide you to the life you’ve always dreamed of.

Something changed in my life when I ventured out on my own, I was forced to live life based on the very traits of my own identity and as a result, I learned much more about myself and what I want from life. I gained more control over my life and I developed a new set of powers that I never knew existed.

The more I learned about myself, the more I became confident with just being myself. For instance, I learned that I could draw strength from struggle, I found that I could lift my spirits without intoxication and I realised that I can pretty much accomplish anything I wanted in life so long as I truly desired it.

The more my identity grew stronger the clearer my dreams became and with it, the more powers I accumulated:

The Power to Control Time:

When you begin to live life by the very identity that defines your true aspirations, you can develop the power to control time. It gives you the courage to walk away from circumstances that add zero value to your life, giving you the time to invest in your own pursuits. You become very aware of time and how you spend it, and no longer are you a slave to time as you will learn to master it.

The Power to Read People:

The day you start becoming more confident and more yourself, you’ll begin to notice differences in certain people around you. Your ability to understand others grows stronger and you’ll perceive certain people differently. You’ll notice those that are in your support network and those who are merely present for personal gratification. The more confident you become the less concerned you are with being accepted by others, therefore enabling the ability to read people for their true intentions.

The Power to Change Circumstances:

Knowing your identity allows you to really become aware of your emotions, you understand the very things that make you tick, to everything that excites you. You can use this knowledge to affect the outcome of any situation by controlling how you handle it. Furthermore, by turning negatives into positives, you’re building the ability to keep your mind focused in the direction of where you’re headed.

The Power to Travel in Time:

You gain the power to see into the future because you become very aware of the path you’re on. Knowing yourself allows you to answer questions about your future, thus allowing you to identify what it is you need to do to make that future a certainty.

No longer will you be blurred by the struggles or controlled by the expectations that affected how you lived your life. You’ll have the power to change how you view the past; you can reflect on your life and use situations that you deemed disadvantageous and learn from them. You begin to use your past as a source of strength rather than a trigger for weakness.

The Power to Source other Powers:

Living by your own identity allows you to learn about your own strengths and weaknesses. Therefore giving you the power to source out other individuals who you can learn from, who possess the strengths you desire. Powerful people attract a network of powerful people; it’s like this secret society where money, success and social status are just words.

True power comes from identity and individuality, you become open to learning about different beliefs and purposes. You learn from others to help reach your own destination.

As you begin to break down the walls that surround your identity, you’ll begin to develop these new powers. The more you stay true to yourself and what you want from life you’ll nurture each power into superpowers, and you’ll begin to drift into this new plane of consciousness where bulls*** will no longer exist.

Vancouver Relationship and Life Coach

5 Things Every Relationship Should Have

I often get asked why I post about relationships on this blog; it’s because relationships are a huge part of an individual’s success. People can hold each other back and people can propel  each other  forward. If I can provide my input to help others achieve the latter, then I believe this post fits right in.

Take what you will from the following list, but my entire relationship history has taught me to look out for the following 5 components.

1. Vulnerability. You need to be 100% yourself and honest around each other, be vulnerable enough to bare each other’s soul and share each other’s spirit. Being vulnerable is also being honest, which makes room for trust and to be easily read and to be easily understood. It keeps the relationship raw.

2. Identity. There’s nothing worse than getting into a relationship when you haven’t figured out who you are yet. Make it a mission to stay individual and embrace each other’s individuality. Strong identities in a relationship make it apparent when the other is not around. Make it easy to miss each other.

3. Support. Be each other’s biggest fan and support each other’s dreams. Ignite each other’s passions and beliefs and make it a passion of yours to watch the other become whole. Understand that you both began your own journey and rather than getting in the way of someone’s path, offer the support to help finish it.

4. Encouragement. Encourage each other  to become the best version of yourselves, rather than a version of a person that isn’t true.  To offer the encouragement to live life to the fullest and actually want to push each other to succeed towards individual goals and help each other overcome any crumb of doubt.

5. Challenge. Challenge each other, nothing turns loyal lovers to promiscuity more than the lack of a challenge. Challenge is at number five for a reason, if 1 to 4 are satisfied then challenging each other becomes second nature. It’ll encourage you to always keep the relationship fresh, to consistently remind, to prove and to embrace the reason the two of you stuck together.

If you review the list you’ll notice it’s actually really simple.

VanCity

Music: The Paper Kites – Bloom

Dare to dream – A message inspired by a 13-year-olds ambition.

Always in search of inspiration, I had overlooked the bright spark we had sitting right at home. We always encourage the younger generation in our family to visualise their dreams, take action towards achieving them and to dream big.

My sister had asked her children to work on their Vision boards and within the hour, my 13-year-old niece had finished the project (see below) and presented insightful results. Now the first thing we all noticed was her typo, she was so motivated and excited about the project, she had overlooked her spelling error. When her mother mentioned it, she candidly responded “I’m unique, I’ll spell it however I want!” as she defended her work.

tanya vision Tanya’s vision board, focused around the Joel Brown quote “see the invisible, believe the incredible, achieve the impossible”.

After seeing this and hearing about her response, I had never been more in awe of the brilliant-ness that is this young teen. She, (now unknowingly, my honorary ambassador of the lions life) had made us as adults realise the importance of what we say and do around young people and the effect we have on young minds. The outcome of her board allowed us to also understand her as a person, the steps we can take to help her “achive” those dreams and how to guide her in ways she can help herself. I’m actually glad she didn’t fix her typo, A vision board is made to represent dreams and goals, the typo not only adds a splash of her personality, but it will act as a constant reminder that there are things she will need to improve upon.

Seeing this really emphasises the importance of knowing what you want out of life, it definitely made me re-evaluate a few things. It starts with a vision and where you see yourself. If a 13-year-old, with all the peer pressures and changes going on around her, can and wants to take ownership of her life by having the guts to dream, what’s our excuse as adults?

The secondary tone to this, is one for parents, older siblings or generally anyone who has susceptible minds/young minds around them. Be very careful of the energy and message you send out. Remember negativity breeds negativity, set a positive example – it’s important.

To Tanya,

Congratulations! You’ve managed to do what millions of grown-ups are afraid of and dared to dream. Now that you’ve set the destination, I know you’ll work hard on building the path to get there.

 Live it, Love it,

T

Vancouver Relationship and Life Coach